August 08, 2010

Dinner For Schmucks

Steve Carell's character is really more schmo than schmuck, but we laughed till we plotzed anyway.

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March 13, 2010

I don't know nothin' 'bout birthin' no democracies

In Green Zone, Matt Damon and his shaky cameraman from the Bourne flicks take on the Iraq Unpleasantness. To the nauseating camerawork is added grainy film stock. In this age of HDTV, should a Major Motion Picture look like it was shot on a cellphone? Especially with a script that has all the subtlety and nuance of Michael Moore explaining imperialism to a four year old? Meh.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 09:11 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 23, 2009

Inglourbious Bastrardes

Meh. Another ultra-violent Tarantino oeuvre. The special unit roaming behind enemy lines, killing Nazis is not exactly a new idea in Tinseltown. Brad Pitt is no Lee Marvin. But then Martin Wuttke is no Hitler. In fact, there are cats that look more like Hitler.

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August 17, 2009

Hypocritical Sacks of Shit in the News

I made this movie as if it was going to be the last movie I was allowed to make.

So says filmaker Michael Moore about his forthcoming screed My Dinner With Andre The Giant.

The rest of us can only hope, Mike. Only hope.

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August 09, 2009

Julie/Julia

You can never have too much butter. Yum!

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April 18, 2009

State Of Play

The movie was entertaining enough, but the main lesson that Team McBlogger takes away from this evening is that it's all fun and games until someone throws a chair.

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February 15, 2009

This looks like fun...

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January 18, 2009

Gran Torino

As usual, Clint Eastwood takes out the trash. Of course, the Man With No Name would have gotten a lot fewer perforations.

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October 05, 2008

How to Lose Friends & Alienate People

I've seen this movie before. Only last time it was called The Devil Wears Prada.

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June 17, 2008

Half In The Bag

Baghead.... this is a movie?

It sounds more like a Saturday Night Live sketch. That they showed in the last half hour. During one of those seasons they've now erased all the tapes of.

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April 27, 2008

Harold And Kumar: Friends Don't Let Friends Watch Lame Sequels

It's a story that writes itself: low budget film becomes a cult classic, leading to Hollywood dropping money into a sequel, which sucks more than all the Hoovers in all the towns in all the world. Someone could make that into a movie, in fact. And then someone else could remake that movie into a sequel, which would suck. It's sort of like reverse recycling, turning good things into garbage.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 11:13 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

January 26, 2008

There Will Be Blood

Okay, we get it. Oilmen are ruthless. Who knew?

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September 22, 2007

Mister Woodcock

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Heh heh heh heh heh he said woodcock heh hehe heh heh hee

Seriously, no matter how many funny lines you have (and this flick has plenty) Oedipus Rex really doesn't work as a comedy.

Good thing the theatre was almost empty. I'd hate to think that next summer we'd be treated to Sleepless in Sparta.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 09:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 02, 2007

The Bourne Whatever

Somewhat entertaining, but it was no "Snakes On A Plane!"

Essentially one long chase scene after another without much of a story.

And for God's sake, people: enough with the shaky, handheld camera! You're spending millions of dollars making a movie... unless it's actually set in an earthquake, get a freakin' tripod!

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June 15, 2007

And this, boys and girls, is why ww have focus groups

I guess I picked the wrong election cycle to quit smoking dope.

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And this, boys and girls, is why ww have focus groups

I guess I picked the wrong election cycle to quit smoking dope.

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June 08, 2007

I hate stupid movie commercials

There've been fifty-six deaths in 1408.

Hard to imagine how that damn hotel stays in business.

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July 28, 2006

Mandrake, have you ever seen a commie drink a glass of water?

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If you watch Comedy Central late at night you're probably aware that a new flick called America: From Freedom to Fascism is opening in Austin today. While it would seem that the title could encompass a wide range of outrages, this movie actually seems to focus on the particular part of the crackpotosphere which holds that all evil flows from the Internal Revenue Service and the Federal Reserve. Of course, they are part and parcel of the nefarious New World Order conspiracy which leads to black helicopters in our skies, fluoride in our water, and jackbooted UN troops in our streets. Sort of like an Alex Jones/Jeff Davis public access show except presumably the guy in the control room knows how to run the audio board. Of course, I can only guess about that since bloggers were excluded from the press screening.

Far more intriguing is the recommendation given by Todd David Schwartz, who says this film

Makes Fahrenheit 911 look like Bambi

(I know I always have to fight back the tears when that mean hunter shoots Michael Moore's mom.)

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Still, since I haven't seen the movie and presumably he has, I'll leave the last word to TDS:

"I would advise movie theatre managers to hand out vomit bags. You may end up needing one."

Kind of sounds like Gigli.

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