June 12, 2010

Wankers

Seems that Brits have their knickers in a twist about the USA’s criticism of British Petroleum. Some of them claim that this “anti-British rhetoric” is causing a severe drop in the company’s stock and that no dividends will be paid out to UK pension funds. Apparently, pensioners will be thrown out on the streets, and unable to have their pudding because they can no longer afford to eat their meat. Curse those damn socialist and their redistribution of wealth.

We sure didn’t hear this whining when we saved their asses from Hitler and the Nazis. If it were not for us, the Brits would be speaking German and mass producing Volkswagens.

Who needs these snotty tea-sippers? Are they too good for natty light? Hell, they don’t even allow guns. Then there is that uppity accent. We should kick all the Brits out of this country, or at least throw them in the Gulf to soak up the oil.

Now is the time to change our vocabulary to freedom muffins, freedom peas, freedom thermal unit, and you put freedom on the ball. We’ll show those limeys. Also, heard a rumor that Osama Bin Laden is hiding out in Buckingham Palace.

Yeah, this is silly. Just like the French bashing leading up to this country’s invasion of Iraq.
Like then, oil is the catalyst for rancorous rhetoric and rude behavior between allies.

The most vocal public figure is gaffe-prone conservative Mayor of London Boris Johnson who is considered in many quarters, including the right, as a buffoon. He rode to victory behind a brilliant strategist who kept Johnson’s mouth shut, limited his public appearances, and was successful in getting out the vote.

Since Johnson seems to be manipulated by conservatives, and his anger is almost exclusively aimed at President Obama, would it be too outrageous to suggest that he is a proxy for GOP operatives across the pond who are whispering in his ear.


Posted by Captain Kroc at June 12, 2010 09:59 AM

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