June 30, 2007

What's in a hand?

According to New York Magazine, more than likely your sexual orientation. The magazine has an exhaustive series on 'gayness' generally and more specifically on the genetic characteristics that differentiate gays and lesbians from heterosexuals (AKA, breeders). Here are a few characteristics found more often, for example, in gay men than in straight men:

1) Counterclockwise hair 'whorl'.
2) Being left handed
3) Index finger being longer than or as long as ring finger

Granted, none of these things are complete and total proof. For example, I know many left handed men who like to go downtown, if you know what I mean. Ewe. Straight boys are gross. However, if you have all three of these traits, send me an email and maybe we can meet for a drink, handsome!

The article delves into possible biological reasons for homosexuality as well as a cursory analysis of genetic underpinnings for homosexuality and the ethics of genetically engineering homosexuality away. The bottom line? We don't know enough and changing a child's genetics in utero is probably a bad idea. What if the purpose of homosexuality is to provide a break in certain genetic lines? What if homosexuals are in some way essential to humanity's survival as a species? What if the world becomes heterosexual only? Can you imagine the garish fashion and drab design??!?!

What those interviewed did seem to know is that the evidence all points to a genetic predisposition. Which is probably what Falwell recently found out when he finally met God. He probably also got reprimanded for pretending to talk to him all those years.

Posted by mcblogger at 04:04 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

R Kelly is a genius

Last night I went to a party to celebrate and view the first twelve chapters of R Kelly's Trapped in the Closet. Click the link and go watch. I dare you. You won't be able to stop. The fucking thing is so bad you just can't pull away from it. And there are supposedly 30 more chapters to go with the next installment due in less than 30 days.

I don't think the world is ready.

Posted by mcblogger at 12:02 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 29, 2007

Dick Cheney, the fourth branch of government

Click here for the best analysis on Cheney's claim that he is not, in fact, part of the Executive Branch.

Posted by mcblogger at 05:07 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The SC overturns deseg plans

What's the practical effect of the SC decision overturning racial quotas as a basis for desegregation plans? It will dramatically alter the racial profiles of schools across the country. It may also be the one thing that saves public education in this country.

Yeah, I'm not entirely sold on this being a bad thing.

For one, deseg orders were part of an era when populations were willfully separated. To this day, I still see restrictive covenants on title to real property prohibiting it's sale to 'negros', 'asians' and almost every other ethnic group. I've even seen one that covers 'those who exhibit moral turpitude'. Not exactly enlightened times. That era was also known for a practice in lending called redlining, not to mention willfully discriminating against those deemed undesirable on the basis of race, a practice that is now a violation of federal law. Those restrictive covenants are thoroughly unenforceable.

On the other side, the Constitution is now officially colorblind in all matters. To quote our learned Chief Justice...

“The way to stop discrimination on the basis of race is to stop discriminating on the basis of race,” he said. His side of the debate, the chief justice said, was “more faithful to the heritage of Brown,” the landmark 1954 decision that declared school segregation unconstitutional.

No, really, John, you're an idiot. Seriously, that's one of the dumbest things I've ever read. Fucktard.

The conservatives (AKA, the stupidiots), think that they have struck a blow against discrimination. By banning all discrimination based on race, no matter how well intentioned. Clarence Thomas seems especially proud of himself. Kennedy, who voted with the majority, provides the limiting guidance on the majority...

In a separate opinion that could shape the practical implications of the decision and provide school districts with guidelines for how to create systems that can pass muster with the court, Justice Kennedy said achieving racial diversity, “avoiding racial isolation” and addressing “the problem of de facto resegregation in schooling” were “compelling interests” that a school district could constitutionally pursue as long as it did so through programs that were sufficiently “narrowly tailored.”

Though the NYT doesn't read this as a slap down of the majority, it very much is. These cases were about individual children. What Kennedy is doing with his separate opinion is giving guidance on integration plans that won't be based on individuals but will, instead, be based on a broader communities.

Among the measures that Justice Kennedy said would be acceptable were the drawing of school attendance zones, “strategic site selection of new schools,” and directing resources to special programs. These would be permissible even if adopted with a consciousness of racial demographics, Justice Kennedy said, because in avoiding the labeling and sorting of individual children by race they would satisfy the “narrow tailoring” required to meet the equal protection demands of the 14th Amendment.

I wrote earlier that this may be the decision that saves public schools and I think it will be because for one thing it will force school districts to focus on overall demographics of a school population, not as much on individual students. This will hopefully keep kids in schools closer to their homes, increasing parent involvement and student achievement while maintaining racial diversity. It's a hell of a lot better than bussing little Johnny and Jenny across town because of the color of their skin.

Further, one can hope it will also force those who care about schools to get more involved in making sure that all schools are well maintained for all students. Which was the goal of Brown in the first place.

Posted by mcblogger at 03:10 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

I'm sorry to announce...

...that The Mayor has been arrested in Israel for assaulting 39% with pastry. The Mayor, on a business trip to purchase land for a manufacturing plant in the Palestinian Authority, ran into 39% in Tel Aviv. Upon seeing the Governor, he asked the child of an associate what would be an appropriate greeting for someone you hate and, after the suggestion was made to throw rocks, proceeded instead to hurl pies at 39%. And Robert Black.

Via phone, Mayor McSleaze said, "The kid suggested throwing rocks but to me, that was just a little too 'Third World'. So, with the help of a nearby bakery, I was able to instead throw date and fig fried pies at 39%. Truth be told, I think they were probably harder than rocks, anyway."

We're taking up a collection for his bail and legal fees. Currently, after only 20 minutes of fundraising, we have raised close to $22 million. Just by telling people that we're raising money to help someone who threw a pie at 39%.

Of course, Mayor McSleaze, being incredibly wealthy, can afford his own bail. However, his thinking is that Texans should step up and pay him for actually doing what they all want to do.

Posted by mcblogger at 01:10 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Bush stonewalls Congress

OK, Congress... go after the son of a bitch and get the evidence. It's time for some fucking accountability in the Executive Branch.

WASHINGTON (AP) -- President Bush, moving toward a constitutional showdown with Congress, asserted executive privilege Thursday and rejected lawmakers' demands for documents that could shed light on the firings of federal prosecutors.

Bush's attorney told Congress the White House would not turn over subpoenaed documents from former presidential counsel Harriet Miers and former political director Sara Taylor.

Congressional panels want the documents for their investigations of Attorney General Alberto Gonzales' stewardship of the Justice Department, including complaints of undue political influence.

The Democratic chairmen of the two committees seeking the documents accused Bush of stonewalling and disdain for the law, and said they would press forward with enforcing the subpoenas.

Tony Snow, while talking to reporters, had this to say...

"It's pretty clear that again members of Congress are engaged in an attempt ... to try to do what they can to make life more difficult for the White House," Snow said. "It also explains why this is the least popular Congress in decades, because you do have what appears to be a strategy of destruction rather than cooperation."

Uhm, Tony, the only reason they are a little unpopular (compared to the President who is even less popular) is that they haven't been mean enough to him. While people may be pissed at Congress, they HATE your boss. Compared to the President, Nancy Pelosi is BELOVED.

Posted by mcblogger at 09:57 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 28, 2007

Fucking hell I hate Dennis Kucinich

I'm watching the debate on PBS which is, as I thought it would be, LAMER THAN WATCHING MY HOUSEMATE'S DOG LICK THE CARPET. Kucinich was just on... I'd like to beat him up sometime. I really hate him. Sorry Kucinich fans, the guy is annoying, not altogether there and ugly as fucking hell.

I don't care to hear your thoughts on him. Please don't share them in the comments. Seriously, I feel that strongly about him. I want him out of the race because he's a fucktard. Here are the others who are POINTLESS:

Richardson - Fuckall, is there a way for him to NOT be condescending?

Biden - Two words, asshole... Bankruptcy Bill. If you don't drop out soon, the next time you're in Texas I'm going to put my foot up your ass. Then I'm going to send you a bill for the shoe.

Gravel - Actually, I'm liking his 'gruff old man/GET OFF MY LAWN, YOU ROTTEN KIDS' routine. I also like his plan to end the worthless War on Drugs. However, reality is a reality and no one wants to elect Grandpa Cranky.

/rant

Sorry, y'all, just had to get that off my chest.

Posted by mcblogger at 08:54 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

Darth Cheney

Oh, I don't really know what to say about the WaPo series on Dick Cheney, other than that it's very well written and comprehensively researched. I guess I could tell you that reading it will leave you absolutely infuriated and ready to march on the White House.

It'll take a while to get through all four sections but it's well worth it to see just how far one man has gone to dismantle this country to remake it according to his own insane design.

Posted by mcblogger at 04:46 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The Court swings right

Thanks a lot, Joe Lieberman...

The Supreme Court yesterday limited students' speech and shielded the White House faith-based program from legal challenge in 5-4 rulings that, along with a similar split in the campaign-finance case, pointed up the court's shift to the right.

President Bush's two appointees, Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. and Justice Samuel A. Alito Jr., wrote the main opinions in those decisions, including the "Bong Hits 4 Jesus" free-speech case, as well as another ruling the administration and business groups had sought in an environmental case.

Here's the one that really pisses me off...

Alito wrote the court's opinion in Hein v. Freedom From Religion, saying that ordinary taxpayers could not challenge a White House initiative that helps religious charities get a share of federal money.

The decision blocks a lawsuit by a group of atheists and agnostics who object to government conferences in which administration officials encourage religious charities to apply for federal grants.

Bush called the decision "a substantial victory for efforts by Americans to more effectively aid our neighbors in need of help."

Alito said the taxpayers set out "a parade of horribles" that they contended could happen. None did, he wrote, and "in the unlikely event that any of these executive actions did take place, Congress could quickly step in."

In dissent, Souter said the court should have let the taxpayer challenge proceed. The majority "closes the door on these taxpayers because the executive branch, and not the legislative branch, caused their injury," he wrote. "I see no basis for this distinction."

REGARDLESS, Federal money should not be going to religious organizations, no matter how well intentioned.

Posted by mcblogger at 02:50 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell

Equality Texas and Atticus Circle have sent out a request to sign a petition asking members of Congress to repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell. Whatever your feelings about us homos, the reality is that the military is losing men and women, because of this stupid policy, that could be of tremendous benefit to our country. These people only want to serve and the only reason they are barred from that service is their sexual orientation.

Yeah, yeah... petitions are worthless. If that's true, then what can it possibly hurt to sign the damn thing? Take 30 seconds out of your life and do it.

Posted by mcblogger at 09:06 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 27, 2007

Clinton a fundraising machine...

Oh, if money were all it took...

With four days left for fundraising in the second quarter of 2007, it appears that Mrs. Clinton is almost certainly going to raise more money this period than a leaked Clinton campaign memo originally estimated. Just last night she raised $1 million at an event where the campaign memo had projected raising $400,000 to $500,000.

That memo, which was provided to The Times last month by an uncommitted Democrat unaffiliated with any campaign, estimated that the Clinton campaign would raise roughly $27 million this quarter, which ends June 30. Some of her advisers have predicted raising $27-$30 million for the quarter.

But in recent interviews, several Democrats raising money on Mrs. Clinton’s behalf said that they were exceeding their own goals in the memo by tens of thousands of dollars, some even by hundreds of thousands. Some small-dollar fundrasiers were left off the memo, meanwhile, while a few events did not have any dollar figure attached.

The best part? She had a big event last night in NYC hosted by private equity fund and hedge fund managers. The very same people Congress is about to tax. And they don't seem concerned about a Democrat at all. Of course, Warren Buffett, the second richest man in America, has always been more for Democrats than Republicans. He had the money quote for the evening...

“Hillary Clinton is the person to run this country;” “she’s a real bargain and I’m a bargain hunter;” and, referring to the future stocks and bonds markets if Mrs. Clinton is elected, “10 years out they will be far more up than with any of the Republicans who are running now.”

Posted by mcblogger at 11:31 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The Obligatory Ann Coulter Post

You would think the coverage accorded Paris Hilton's release from jail would be a large enough helping of self-degradation to sate the media's hunger this week. Of course, these days there's no situation so awful that can't be made worse, so I suppose it was no surprise that Hilton's evil twin, Republican mouthpiece Ann Coulter got her chance to make the rounds of the pundotainment shows.

As I've said before, vileness is all Coulter has to offer. Just like when you go to see Gallagher you can expect to see a watermelon hit with a sledgehammer, anyone who invites the GOP's pin-up girl to speak knows she'll say something hateful. Or homophobic. Or racist. With luck, you'll hit the trifecta, and maybe she'll even phrase it all in the form of a terroristic threat.

It's easy to say nasty things about Ann Coulter. But Ann is merely thriving on a toxic social climate, the same way that mold thrives on garbage.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 02:43 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Wow! We're only NC-17

Recently, while visiting INPT, I noticed That Catholic had run the blog through a rating system and found that it rated her efforts an NC-17. Knowing what a potty mouth The Mayor and Sister Ruth have, I thought it would be good to find out how McBlogger was rated.

Online Dating

Mingle2 - Online Dating

No joke. Go to the link and check it out if you don't believe me. All it does for me is make me wonder exactly what the fuck we have to say or do to get an X? Another series of Britney vagina pix?

Posted by mcblogger at 02:41 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

UAW tries (and fails) to shit on the environment

As it turns out, the Big Three US automakers (soon to be known as the Three Little Pigs) teamed up with the UAW to kill tougher fuel efficiency standards in the Senate. This is being spun as helping Nissan, but in reality it helps every automaker who produces high efficiency vehicles.

Unfortunately, that group doesn't include any of the Big Three.

The UAW tried spinning this as harming as many as 17,000 US jobs. What this bill does is put American automakers on notice that they better rethink their business plans and get on hybrids ASAP since that's the only way they'll meet the new standards. That means the automakers and their suppliers are going to have to invest a lot of money. Which means jobs and future prosperity. I guess no one filled in the UAW's leaders about that.

Which is why they are running a union into the ground.

Alan Reuther, the UAW's legislative director, wrote that the proposal "would pose a serious threat to American automotive jobs and to efforts to promote the use of alternative fuels."

Stevens, the ranking Republican on the Senate Commerce Committee, strongly rejected the UAW's arguments.

"There isn't anybody that's harmed in the long run. They all benefit by what we've done," Stevens said.

I find myself agreeing with Ted Stevens of 'The Pipes' fame. For this, I shall always hate you, UAW.

American autoworkers have been too long ill-served by terrible management at the automakers and even more horrendous management at their union. The time for change has come from the Local level on up. If you need any help, just let The Mayor and I know. He's not so much for unions in foreign countries (i.e., The Third World), but he loves them here.

Posted by mcblogger at 10:58 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

When the children turn...

Presidential Scholars, also known as 'high school students' , signed a handwritten petition asking President Bush to stop torturing people captured (or abducted, or extraordinarily rendered) during the war on terror.

The handwritten letter said the students "believe we have a responsibility to voice our convictions."

"We do not want America to represent torture. We urge you to do all in your power to stop violations of the human rights of detainees, to cease illegal renditions, and to apply the Geneva Convention to all detainees, including those designated enemy combatants," the letter said.

Kids never heard of a 'computer'? What, was it written on a cocktail napkin?

Bush was nice, explained that the US doesn't do that sort of thing (Cheney, who was standing close by, snickered) and only had them rendered to Syria AFTER they left the White House.

Posted by mcblogger at 09:43 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 26, 2007

Teacher pay

The Star-Telegram (via Jobsanger) has a great post up about high teacher turnover and massive wage disparity at poorer school districts throughout Texas. Granted, it's common sense, if you pay people less they tend to seek better employment. What is surprising is that wage disparities exist intra-district...

An Arlington teacher working at a campus with fewer poor or minority students is paid an average salary that is $2,700 to $4,700 more than a counterpart who works at a campus with many poor and minority students, according to Education Trust, which used 2005-06 statistics from the Texas Education Agency.

Posted by mcblogger at 07:30 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Dropping Cheney in the grease

Sally Quinn, writing for the Washington Post, says that now might be the time to get rid of Cheney (a real MOTO that Sally) and replace him with Fred Thompson:Male Prostitute (I know, it's Fred GARVIN... but it does SOUND right, doesn't it...).

That leaves Fred Thompson. Everybody loves Fred. He has the healing qualities of Gerald Ford and the movie-star appeal of Ronald Reagan. He is relatively moderate on social issues. He has a reputation as a peacemaker and a compromiser. And he has a good sense of humor.

He could be just the partner to bring out Bush's better nature -- or at least be a sensible voice of reason. I could easily imagine him telling the president, "For God's sake, do not push that button!" -- a command I have a hard time hearing Cheney give.

Not only that, Thompson would give the Republicans a platform for running for the presidency -- and the president a way out of Iraq without looking like he's backing down. Bush would be left in better shape on the war and be able to concentrate on AIDS and the environment in hopes of salvaging his legacy.

Cheney is scheduled this summer for surgery to replace his pacemaker, which needs new batteries. So if the president is willing, and Republicans are able, they have a convenient reason to replace him: doctor's orders. And I'm sure the the vice president would also like to spend more time with his ever-expanding family.

Actually, Sally, not everyone loves Fred Thompson : Male Prostitute. In fact, many of us think he's a sucky actor (who also, I found out over the weekend, was in Die Hard 2) and not much else. Oh, yeah, he was a Senator. Eh.

No, no... Sally, if you want to throw Cheney under a bus you're going to need the help of the Senate. Sister Ruth pointed out that there IS one candidate on whom I think everyone in the Senate could agree...

Posted by mcblogger at 11:00 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Thanks, Kinky!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
No way that Governor 39% could wreck Texas community colleges without your help!

The governor used his line-item veto power to eliminate health-insurance funding for community college employees. Then he accused all 50 community college systems in the state of falsifying health insurance data in an attempt to give employees benefits to which they were not entitled. The state has paid the health insurance benefits for community college employees for decades.

The 80th session of the Texas Legislature held hearings on this issue and recommended a state budget that maintained community college benefits so our institutions can continue to attract and keep the best possible faculty and staff.

How could the governor act like he's just "discovered" a serious misappropriation of state funds? How could he characterize the health benefits that thousands of loyal community college employees have earned for years as "pork?"

Adding another insult to injury, the veto came after the legislative session was over, so there's no opportunity for legislators to overrule the governor's stroke of the red pen. Community colleges must live with this for at least two years.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 10:31 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Pissing onto the Constitution

The Texas Supreme Court, in yet another effort to 'be all that they can be' for corporations, has vacated a judgment in favor of a mechanic whose lungs are fucked all to hell because of asbestos.

The Supreme Court, however, found that the lower courts mistakenly blamed Flores' illness on BorgWarner brake pads based on his frequent, regular exposure to the dust from grinding. But without establishing how much asbestos could have been inhaled or whether the amounts were sufficient to cause asbestosis, there is no way to judge BorgWarner's liability, the court said.

"There is no question, on this record, that mechanics in the braking industry could be exposed to respirable asbestos fibers. But without more, this testimony is insufficient to establish that the BorgWarner brake pads were a substantial factor in causing Flores' disease," Chief Justice Wallace Jefferson wrote on behalf of the unanimous court.

Will bars use this a defense when they are sued in drunk driving accident cases? Two things are certain... there need to be some changes on the Supreme Court and the Republican Supreme Court just made it easier for corporations to offload their liabilities on taxpayers. Come on, you don't for a second think that it won't be taxpayers who ultimately will pay the bill for this guys' health care. Not that I'm complaining... just wish Borg Warner would pick up IT'S share of the tab.

Here's an idea... when you go to get brakes, make sure they weren't made by BorgWarner. If they don't want to pay their share then fuck them and their shitty business.


Posted by mcblogger at 09:07 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 25, 2007

Chet goes for redemption...

OK, this is a great start.

"For weeks, the White House budget office threatened to veto this bill, because it was above their request," Edwards said in the Democrats' weekly radio address. "Fortunately, the president finally backed down on his threat to this historic veterans' bill, but only after it was clear that Congress would override a veto."

But it doesn't nearly make up for this. Speaking of, you ready to vote to restore habeas corpus? Chet?

Posted by mcblogger at 04:42 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Speaking of assholes...

Well, it's that time of the election cycle that Ralph Nader starts to threaten to run for President if the Democrats don't nominiate someone to his liking. Of course, might ask who died and made St Ralph arbiter of progressive politics. A worthy question, since Nader has never been elected to anything, never bothered to run for any office he might conceivably win... hasn't even joined the Green Party, whose spot at the top of the ticket he assumes is his by divine right.

Some hold Nader responsible for Al Gore's 2000 defeat and the ensuing years of Bushite horror inflicted on the nation. However much blame Nader really deserves for that, his fans really should ask themselves just what Ralph has been doing for THEM lately.

What third parties can do is bring young people in, set standards on how to run a presidential election and keep the progressive agenda in front of the people.

In 2000, many people voted for Nader to help the Green Party gain regular ballot status, legitimising it as a left alternative to the Democrats. Since then, though the Greens have declined, breaking into warring sects in their disagreement over what 2000 had wrought and the way forward. In Texas, they've become irrelevant, unable to even gain write-in status for their 2006 gubernatorial candidate. When you can't have as much political clout as Kinky Friedman, it's time to consider another hobby.

Ralph Nader's vanity campaigns have caused both the nation and the movement he claims to support tremendous harm. It's high time he was set on an ice floe and cast adrift.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 02:00 PM | Comments (0)

Angry mob confronts Rep. Pena!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Just kidding... it's a pic from his blog of folks he was talking with at the Rio Grande Valley Townhall with TDP Chair Richie.

Hey Aaron! We're still pissed at you about that dumb ass CradDICK vote, but we do still like you! No, not enough to help you out should a primary opponent surface, but as a person we think you're swell!

Posted by mcblogger at 01:30 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Drycleaner suing judge gets spanked

The judge in DC who decided to sue his drycleaner over a lot pair of pants (seriously... and for $67 mn, no less), had his head handed to him by another judge who happens to be considerably smarter.

A judge in Washington, D.C. has ruled in favor of a dry cleaner that was initially sued for $67 million over a missing pair of pants.

Roy Pearson sued the owners of Custom Cleaners because Pearson said the cleaners lost an expensive pair of his pants. Pearson was originally seeking $67 million dollars, but reduced the amount to $54 million. He based his claim on his strict interpretation of the city's consumer protection law.

A lawyer for the family that owns the cleaners says his clients misplaced the judge's pants but soon found them. Chris Manning also said Pearson has a history of filing egregious lawsuits.

Pearson has represented himself at trial. He says he has pursued the lawsuit in the interest of Washington, D.C. residents.

Judge Pearson... it's because of people like you (and that McDonalds coffee lady) tort reform became so acceptable. What a dick.

Seriously, do any of you really wonder why I'd never date another attorney?!?!?!?

Posted by mcblogger at 11:02 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Good questions for the Presidential wannabes

Bob Cesca at the Huff Po has some great questions for the Presidential hopefuls on both sides...

RUDY GIULIANI Why are you morbidly and shamelessly exploiting September 11th for political and financial reward when you really had very little to do with the search and rescue effort? In fact, all you did was to act as a substitute teacher while the president of the United States sat calcified like an impotent mope in a Florida classroom.

SENATOR HILLARY CLINTON
Our faces are beginning to melt like that hairless Toht character in Raiders Of The Lost Ark due to the effects of the climate crisis. Why are you wasting your time on spoofy viral videos aimed at teasing your campaign song? You're still a member of the United States Senate, you! And while we're at it, don't you think censoring video game violence is way, way, way down on the list of our national priorities somewhere below eradicating the dreaded Super Power Flick from grade school recess and just above a ban on messin' with Sasquatch?

Posted by mcblogger at 09:28 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 24, 2007

Dude... where's my lake?

Who moved the damn lake?

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

A five-acre glacial lake in Chile's southern Andes has disappeared—and scientists want to know why.

Well, so do I...I'd also like to know

1) Why did Arrested Development really get cancelled?
2) What's floating in my scotch? Ash or a gnat?
3) Will I ever get caught for killing that hobo that time?
4) Tie tacks...why?
5) When going out for drinks with friends is it required that I be polite to the asshole husband of a friend? I'd really rather not.
6) If you're bad in this life, will God reincarnate you as a pony belonging to a fat kid?
7) Why are there so few needlepoint artists with epilepsy?
8) If the Mayor wins the TDP Chair, will he let me head up the 'To Be Purged' Committee?
9) How much is a can of HotShot Wasp and Hornet Killer in rural Mongolia?

$20 bucks says Winona Ryder went klepto and made off with the lake. I'm totally right about this.

Posted by mcblogger at 05:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Tort Reform is little more than Insurance Company profiteering

Peter Stern has a great post up at Somervell County Salon about the effects on Texas consumers of tort reform. The short version? We got screwed. Rates have, instead of dropping, gone up dramatically even though consumers have even less recourse against insurers.

Three years ago with Gov. Perry, then Texas Department of Insurance (TDI) Commissioner Jose Montemayor, and legislators "looking the other way," lax insurance legislation permitted the industry to double the premiums paid by Texas homeowners.

At that time and during the previous several years the insurance industry had been experiencing a "hard market" and was losing revenue, we were told it was due to excessive claims due to storms, , winds, flooding, hail and mold. It had called upon the state informally to help with correcting the market, but few listened to industry pleas.

As in many previous years of "hard markets" the insurance industry elected to act on the problem without waiting any longer for government interaction on its behalf. Virtually overnight it then "over-corrected" the market by doubling home insurance premiums.

In some instances, the industry decreased the coverage and still increased the premiums significantly.

Posted by mcblogger at 11:24 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

June 23, 2007

Jake and Reese breakup?

Oh, come on... it's not like they were really together. We all know that Jake has been seeing Austin...

Posted by mcblogger at 04:57 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Google jumps into plug-in hybrids

Google, through it's philanthropic arm, Google.org, has announced an effort to persuade industry to offer plug-in hybrid vehicles by providing money for R&D (you know, since the automakers, at those in the US, continue to drag their feet on it).

NEW YORK (CNNMoney.com) -- Google said Tuesday it is getting in on the development of electric vehicles, awarding $1 million in grants and inviting applicants to bid for another $10 million in funding to develop plug-in hybrid electric vehicles capable of getting 70 to 100 miles per gallon.

The project, called the RechargeIT initiative and run from Google's philanthropic arm, Google.org, aims to further the development of plug-in hybrid electric vehicles - cars or trucks that have both a gasoline engine and advanced batteries that recharge by plugging into the nation's electric grid.


Granted, this money is a drop in the bucket for the automakers who have R&D budgets on individual car lines that run over $100 million. Still, it's a start and these awards will more than likely go to companies and developers who will concentrate on ways to remake cars and trucks already on the road. Might the next major auto company arise from this project?

Posted by mcblogger at 12:33 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

June 22, 2007

The world will end during or after 2060

According to Isaac Newton's calculations, recently revealed as part of a public release of Newton's papers by the Israeli National Library, the world will end sometime during or after (but not before, damnit!) 2060.

In one manuscript from the early 1700s, Newton used the cryptic Book of Daniel to calculate the date for the apocalypse, reaching the conclusion that the world would end no earlier than 2060.

"It may end later, but I see no reason for its ending sooner," Newton wrote. However, he added, "This I mention not to assert when the time of the end shall be, but to put a stop to the rash conjectures of fanciful men who are frequently predicting the time of the end, and by doing so bring the sacred prophesies into discredit as often as their predictions fail."

Would someone please clue Robertson and the other 'fanciful men' in? As for me, I'll be in my 80's and with the miracle of cosmetic surgery, I should look like this

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

No, I'm not going to change gender. I predict that by the spring of 2059, long hair will be in style for men. So will cat faces.

Posted by mcblogger at 05:16 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Mars, bitches!

Wanna play spaceman?

The European Space Agency is looking for people who would like to go on a pretend trip to Mars — for about a year and a half.

The 520-day experiment involves a crew of six living in sealed modules at the Institute of Biomedical Problems in Moscow.

Promising a program "as close to a real Mars mission as possible," the space agency plans to simulate a 250-day trip to Mars, 30 days to experience the planet and 240 days to make it back home.

Weightlessness and radiation are not included, but the simulated out-of-planet experience offers isolation, confinement, crowding, lack of privacy, high workload, boredom with available food, and limited communication with family, friends and mission control.

Doesn't sound any worse than a cubefarm.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 04:55 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Tolls : Harris County cuts congestion pricing

Yesterday I mentioned that toll rates were going up on the Westpark Tollway in Houston Metro. Apparently, the Harris County Commissioners Court has reversed course on this and abandoned the idea. Why?

BECAUSE IT PISSED PEOPLE OFF


County Judge Ed Emmett announced today that the county will not double fees during peak hours on the Westpark Tollway, backing off a decision made two days earlier that was assailed by many tollway drivers and area residents.

"We will cancel the Westpark (peak-hours) increase,'' he said.

Member of Commissioners Court, especially Commissioner Steve Radack, have received phone calls and e-mails from residents criticizing the court's decision Tuesday to raise Westpark fees from $1 to $2.50 per transaction during peak hours.

Rescinding Tuesday's unanimous vote by the court "was certainly influenced by the public's reaction,'' Emmett said.

No shit, Judge. For those of you in the Lege and in county offices across the state (pay attention, Whitley) who may be thinking tolls are AWESOME, give the Harris County Commissioners a call and ask them how much fun they've had recently.

Posted by mcblogger at 04:24 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

So how effective were the members of the Iscariot Caucus?

Turns out, not so much. The Observer has a great piece up on the their questionable claims of success and their outright lies. Long story short, they fucked over the rest of us and their constituents for nothing.

In all, the Craddick Ds estimate they passed roughly 80 percent of their
proposals. Other Democrats such as Coleman contest that math. An
increase in Medicaid rates for providers and hospitals—which the
Craddick Ds listed among their successes—came about when a decades-old
lawsuit was settled. On higher education, numerous Democrats and rural
Republicans worked to kill a bill that limited the Top 10 Percent
university admissions rule. And it was a bipartisan coalition that
increased funding for state parks, not just Craddick Ds.
...
Then there are the items that the Craddick Ds utterly failed to deliver.
They had hoped to repeal the deregulation of university tuition that has
led to such high prices at Texas colleges. That will never happen as
long as Craddick, who maintains close ties to the University of Texas
System Board of Regents, remains speaker.
...
For Democrats who gave their support to the speaker, a day of reckoning
has yet to come. Three of the Craddick Ds—Kevin Bailey of Houston,
Robert Puente of San Antonio, and Peña—already have likely primary
challengers.

Great report, but master of the obvious when it comes to the end result. He also left out quite a few people. There are people IN LINE to take a swipe at Dukes, that douche Dutton and little Patty Rose. Giddings also has some issues and even Turner may be facing an opponent. The message is clear... DEMOCRATS ALL OVER THE STATE ARE SICK OF YOUR SELF-SERVING SHIT.

Yeah, things have changed. We started paying attention and realized many of you don't have a clue what the hell you're doing.

Posted by mcblogger at 12:34 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

He was a lousy tipper

Oh, come on, Whitmire!

Her manager later told her that "we never refuse the senators," according to a conversation that was recorded, the lawsuit says.

Whitmire could not be reached for comment Wednesday because he was traveling, said Lara Wendler, Whitmire's legislative director.

Wendler, who said she was present that night at the bar, said Lear's allegations against the senator were "complete fabrication."

The owner of the bar could not be reached for comment Wednesday by telephone or on a visit to the Cloak Room.

A bartender refused to comment. Lear and her lawyer also could not be reached for comment.

According to the lawsuit, Whitmire walked into the bar March 8 and asked for a "J&B and water" when Lear was working alone. She served him the drink, but the senator had a "glazed look in his eyes" and was "acting intoxicated," the lawsuit says.

When Whitmire asked for another scotch, Lear gave him a glass of water, telling him she could not legally serve him another drink because he was intoxicated, according to the lawsuit.

Whitmire said he would call the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission and have Lear fired for refusing to serve him, the lawsuit says.

Whitmire also got out of his chair and approached Lear, saying he "would have her job," according to the lawsuit.

Lear told the senator that she would call the police if he continued acting that way, the lawsuit says.

"He responded that the police would not come because all he would have to do was to make a phone call," according to the lawsuit.

Whitmire made more threats and then left, the lawsuit says.

The place is a shithole, but I kinda like it mostly because I get to smoke inside (sorry, Eileen). Honestly, the only time I ever go there is when I'm near the Capitol (rare), meeting people who work at the Capitol (very rare) and occasionally when I'm meeting people downtown who are too lazy to make it to LaLa's (rarer still) mostly because it's a nasty, dank little place and I'm tempted to venture into Charlie's afterward, which is always a mistake. Still, that doesn't excuse treating the staff badly. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO HIRE SOMEONE WHO'LL PUT UP WITH YOUR ASS, WHITMIRE?!?!?!?!!?

And don't ever think YOU can keep the city cops at bay. The last one who thought that was Nixon. Where's he now, John?

Note to members of the Legislature that aren't representing Austin Metro... don't fuck up. We barely tolerate y'all as things stand now.

Especially the Republicans.

Posted by mcblogger at 10:06 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Get well soon, Jobsanger!

I can only imagine how heinous the hospital must be... no booze, no smoking, the food! We at McBlogger wish you a speedy recovery!

Posted by mcblogger at 12:40 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 21, 2007

Tolls : The moratorium that wasn't

And now we know just how much of a moratorium was in 792. EOW has the deets on the meeting last week at which TXDoT approved 87 toll projects...

At a special meeting in Austin, the commission authorized the Texas Department of Transportation to work with local toll entities such as regional tollway authorities, regional mobility authorities and counties to begin moving forward on 87 projects that are currently years away from being fully funded. View map of project locations.

“These are projects that local officials have said are needed to reduce congestion but are waiting in line for funding. We want to help our local partners build the projects as quickly and efficiently as possible,” Williamson said.

To accelerate improvements, the projects are being proposed by TxDOT for development, construction and operation as toll projects.

In case you were wondering, elements of TTC 35 (which Corridor Watch assured us would be in the 'moratorium') are among the 87 approved projects.

To add fuel to the anti-toll fire, HCTRA is raising tolls on all Houston area tollways. The one that will have the biggest increase (DOUBLING during rush hour) is the Westpark Tollway...

Some drivers wondered whether commissioners have forgotten the working people.

"There are people who have budgeted a certain amount for tolls and need to use the tollway to get to work by a certain time in the morning," said Carol Ann Shipp in an e-mail to the Chronicle. These are not affluent professionals for whom the doubling of tolls is negligible. These are hardworking middle class workers who must count every penny."

County Commissioner Steve Radack said those who cannot afford the rush hour fees should use alternate roads.

"Let them go down Richmond Road,'' he said. ``Or they can use Westpark,'' the surface road running nearby the tollway.

Oh, Commissioner (Marie Antoinette) Radack! Not only have you earned yourself an opponent when you're up for re-election, you've guaranteed they'll win. It's rare that you get a chance to see a politician cut his own throat, so when it happens we sometimes miss it. I'm so glad I saw this one! It's almost like watching Krusee go down with the ship on 1892!

In another part of the state, the NTRTC decided to save themselves and awarded the 121 Tollway to the North Texas Tollway Authority instead of Cintra. Of course, TXDoT's Dick Williamson reserves the right to overturn that and award it to Cintra who came in the lower of the two in the bidding. Why on earth would Williamson shortchange North Texas taxpayers? Simple... he's dumb enough to think that the Cintra deal is better because they've assured him they'll eat the losses if the traffic projections fail to materialize.

Is this the same kind of 'assurance' Kolkhorst got from 39% that TTC 35 would be in the moratorium before she flipped on Amendment 13? Or, is Williamson really so stupid that he thinks Cintra's shareholders are dumb enough to come into this with their collective noses open?

I'm betting it's the latter.

Why? Simple. Those contracts have inflated traffic estimates. Should the traffic fail to materialize, THE PRIVATE CONTRACTOR CAN PUT THE LOSS TO THE STATE AND BE REIMBURSED. Should the traffic materialize and the road still lose money, the private contractor would be forced to eat the loss. Dick Williamson, the eternal optimist, actually thinks the traffic will materialize. Problem is, it won't. It never will and taxpayers will end up paying the tab for Dick Williamson's stupidity.

Yes, Dick, you're an idiot. You and your patron, 39%. You boys both drive a hard bargain... it's hard as hell to get private enterprise interested in an investment where they are guaranteed not to lose a dime and instead stand to make billions. With folks like y'all in government, it's no wonder our pensions are underfunded and we can barely keep our schools open.


Posted by mcblogger at 02:00 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Fucked up...

from The AAS

David Rivas Morales, a 41-year-old house painter, had hitched a ride home with a co-worker Tuesday night when, investigators say, the driver of the car accidentally struck a 2-year-old boy near an apartment complex parking lot.

The driver got out of the Ford Taurus, which police say was surrounded by as many as 20 men, and was attacked by several of them, according to investigators.

Morales got out to try to shield the driver. He was instead beaten to death.

Austin police investigators said Wednesday that according to the handful of people they have interviewed, no one immediately around the car did anything to stop the attack.

By the time an anonymous caller dialed 911 and the first officers arrived at the Booker T. Washington housing development shortly after 9:30 p.m., the crowd had dispersed, Austin police Cmdr. Harold Piatt said.

The incident occurred about two blocks from where thousands of people gathered at Rosewood Park for the annual celebration of Juneteenth, marking the day slaves were emancipated in Texas in 1865.

Hispanic and African American leaders, fearing that the incident would create racial tension because the victim was Hispanic and the assailants were believed to be black, urged people to keep their emotions in check. Investigators said they have no indication that the attack was racially motivated.

"This is an anomaly for Austin," Piatt said. "When you have someone just beaten to death in a parking lot."

Piatt said Wednesday that "at this point, we aren't aware that any person did anything to stop the assault or prevent the injuries."

The 2-year-old, Michael Hosea Jr., was not seriously injured, authorities said.

Posted by mcblogger at 11:34 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Antonin Scalia and his imaginary friends

The Gonzomuckracker (via Who's Playin') has a rather interesting story up about SC Justice Antonin 'Crazier than Dan Branch and Leo Berman Combined' Scalia's defense of torture. While at a jurists conference in Canada, Justice Scalia, in response to a statement by a Canadian judge to the effect that most of the countries represented DID NOT subscribe to the Jack Bauer method of interrogation, spewed crazy like a sewage sprinkler...

"Jack Bauer saved Los Angeles. ... He saved hundreds of thousands of lives," Judge Scalia said. Then, recalling Season 2, where the agent's rough interrogation tactics saved California from a terrorist nuke, the Supreme Court judge etched a line in the sand.

"Are you going to convict Jack Bauer?" Judge Scalia challenged his fellow judges. "Say that criminal law is against him? 'You have the right to a jury trial?' Is any jury going to convict Jack Bauer? I don't think so.

"So the question is really whether we believe in these absolutes. And ought we believe in these absolutes."

OK, Antonin, Jack's not so much real. He's a character. On a TV show. Played (apparently very) convincingly by Keifer Sutherland. It's not real life and the reason you know that, is that terrorists on the show blew up Santa Clarita, CA. In the real world, where we live, no one would waste a nuke on Santa Clarita.

Yeah, It's time to retire, Antonin. Seriously, batshit crazy only qualifies you for executive office. We need smart, 'all here' people to sit on the bench.

Posted by mcblogger at 10:12 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 20, 2007

The Whole Enchilada

Some theoretical physicists devote their careers to the search for the Grand Unified Field Theory, explaining the relationship between gravitation, electromagnetism, and sub-atomic forces. In like fashion, some conspiracy theorists hunt their own holy grail, a grand unified conspiracy theory that ties together everything from the Freemasons and the Defenestration of Prague to the Kennedy assassination and Rick Perry's hair in one handy ball of tinfoil. This video doesn't quite succeed, but you'll have to admit progress is being made.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 11:57 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Dude... the mafia is more competent.

Major General Taguba, the officer charged with investigating the abuses at Abu Ghraib, apparently was kind of shocked by the pressure he received from all sides of the DoD and the Administration. Not long after his report was released (which happened to drop the CIA, MP's and others in the grease) he remembers a conversation with General Abizaid

General John Abizaid, then the head of Central Command. A few weeks after his report became public, Taguba, who was still in Kuwait, was in the back seat of a Mercedes sedan with Abizaid. Abizaid’s driver and his interpreter, who also served as a bodyguard, were in front. Abizaid turned to Taguba and issued a quiet warning: “You and your report will be investigated.”

“I wasn’t angry about what he said but disappointed that he would say that to me,” Taguba said. “I’d been in the Army thirty-two years by then, and it was the first time that I thought I was in the Mafia.”

General, the mafia is far more competent. If they'd been in charge, there wouldn't have been any pictures to investigate.

So, what was the end result? Taguba was asked to resign... for doing his job

In January of 2006, Taguba received a telephone call from General Richard Cody, the Army’s Vice-Chief of Staff. “This is your Vice,” he told Taguba. “I need you to retire by January of 2007.” No pleasantries were exchanged, although the two generals had known each other for years, and, Taguba said, “He offered no reason.” (A spokesperson for Cody said, “Conversations regarding general officer management are considered private personnel discussions. General Cody has great respect for Major General Taguba as an officer, leader, and American patriot.”)

“They always shoot the messenger,” Taguba told me. “To be accused of being overzealous and disloyal—that cuts deep into me. I was being ostracized for doing what I was asked to do.”

Taguba went on, “There was no doubt in my mind that this stuff”—the explicit images—“was gravitating upward. It was standard operating procedure to assume that this had to go higher. The President had to be aware of this.” He said that Rumsfeld, his senior aides, and the high-ranking generals and admirals who stood with him as he misrepresented what he knew about Abu Ghraib had failed the nation.

Damn skippy, General.

Posted by mcblogger at 06:15 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

World Refugee Day

World Refugee Day - Hutto Detention Center Vigil
Saturday, June 23, 1-3pm
Hutto Detention Center, 1001 Welch St., Taylor, TX, 75674

The T. Don Hutto detention center, operated by Corrections Corporation of America, a for-profit prison company, incarcerates up to 400 asylum seeking and migrant families, about half of whom are children, who are awaiting hearings before the immigration court. Children spend up to 22 hours a day in prison cells and receive inadequate education and recreational time.

Vigil participants from Austin will leave at 12 noon from 1210 E. Rosewood to carpool to the facility. Please bring signs, sunscreen, hats, and water. For more information, email boblibal@gmail.com or call (512) 971-0487.

Sponsored by Amnesty International USA in honor of World Refugee Day and co-sponsored by Freedom Ambassadors, Texans United for Families, CAFHTA, and LULAC National.

Posted by Captain Kroc at 04:34 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Flyway or direct connector... does it really matter? Just BUILD it!

Kuff has an interesting piece up about he construction of connectors in SA from the 281 freeway to the 410. Anyone who's been stuck in traffic in this miasma (like, I don't know, a certain someone I see every time I look in the mirror) knows this has been going on for a while and basically shrugs and says, "It's about time". I'm thrilled TXDoT is finally getting 'round to this, but Kuff's post left me with a question...

WHY THE HELL DID IT TAKE MORE THAN 30 YEARS FOR TXDOT TO BUILD IT?!?!?!?!? Yeah, yeah, I know about the enviro's, but when all that was settled, why the hell did is still take so long?

You're probably wondering why I'm even reading this. First, I have to drive through that area a couple of times a week and it's always irritating. Second, I live in Austin... remember all those missing flyways I mentioned a few months ago? Yeah... this same situation will crop up in Austin Metro in a few years, not 30. Which brings me to the conclusion that TXDoT has NO institutional memory and even less common sense.

Which reminds me... has anyone done a full on audit of the tollways in Central Texas? After all, money was raised for these connectors and the only reason they weren't built, according to Bob Daigh of TXDoT, was the lack of environmental clearance. SO, what happened to the money, Bob?

Posted by mcblogger at 02:17 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Speaking of Cornyn...

cornyn_dickhead.jpg Turns out the junior Senator from Texas is kinda, you know, disliked. At least he is according to the people at Survey USA who supposedly know about such things

A new Survey USA poll released today shows that more Texans now disapprove of the way Senator John Cornyn is handling his job than approve. Only 42% of Texans approve of the way Cornyn is handling his job, with 43% disapproving.

Cornyn’s approval rating hasn’t cracked 50% since 2005 and has slipped four points since last month. Cornyn continues to have the lowest job approval rating of any incumbent running for re-election in the country.

“John Cornyn is about as popular in Texas as three-dollar gas and wool sweaters in June,” DSCC spokesman Matthew Miller said. “Texans have gone from quietly tolerating Cornyn’s poor record and partisan antics to actively demanding a change, and next year they’re going to have an opportunity to vote for one.”

For more information and links to the actual data jump over to StopCornyn.

(Thanks to SS for the pic!)

Posted by mcblogger at 10:08 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

June 19, 2007

Recapping Edwards in Austin

(sorry about the delay in posting this...)

I gotta say, I was impressed with Sen. Edwards at the grassroots event last week. I like his stance on environmental issues and his commitment to clean energy. Actually, I'm not going to do a summary of the policy points because I'm not all that lazy today and others have already done it. What about impressions... OK, here goes.

It was the first time I was really impressed with one of the Democratic Presidential candidates. Seriously, I like them all but until last Monday I hadn't had a WOW moment. Truth be told, I had one at the fundraiser. It was brief, but it was palpable, a sense that this is someone I can get behind (not that way, perv), fully support and KNOW won't let me down by going lame in the general election.

Considering that we are nine months from the TX primary, I've not been paying a lot of attention to the presidential race because the R side is full of people who need a maintenance dose of thorazine and the D side is full of really capable people. It's been one of those rare times when I haven't really cared one way or another. I care now. I think Edwards will be the best choice.

That doesn't mean I'm not going to keep listening and watching. Hell, by the end of it all I may be voting for McSleaze as a write in. However, what I saw last week impressed me. For the first time in the still nascent 2008 cycle.

Posted by mcblogger at 06:50 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

WH and RNC refuse to come clean on emails...

That's right! The emails they said didn't exist actually do. Not only that, but more people at the White House turn out to have had RNC accounts than was initially admitted.

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- E-mail records are missing for 51 of the 88 White House aides with Republican Party accounts, the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee reported Monday.

The White House says the accounts were set up to keep political work separate from official business, but investigators concluded White House officials used the accounts to conduct official business in a way that circumvented the Watergate-era Presidential Records Act.

The 37 accounts the Republican National Committee did save include nearly 675,000 individual messages -- more than 140,000 of them from Karl Rove, President Bush's top political adviser.

"Whether intentionally or inadvertently, it appears that the RNC has destroyed a large volume of the e-mails of White House officials who used RNC e-mail accounts," the report states.

The committee found 88 officials who held GOP e-mail accounts; the White House had acknowledged 50.

So, the next question becomes, did Gonazales know? Of course... not only that, but when he gave the order to preserve WH communications, he didn't even enforce maintenance of the RNC accounts that were being used to skirt the law.

The committee found that although then-White House counsel Alberto Gonzales ordered presidential staff to preserve official e-mails from outside accounts, he failed to enforce that policy.

Ralston told investigators that Gonzales, now attorney general, knew Rove was using his party e-mail account for official business, "but took no action to preserve Mr. Rove's official communications," the report states.

And the Republicans wonder why no one trusts them? Even their attorney's are either stupid, criminal or some combo of the two.

Posted by mcblogger at 02:14 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

It's time to repeal...

When we're cutting off our collective nose to spite our face, it's time we drop the ridiculous ban on LGBT military service.

Posted by mcblogger at 12:04 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

A tale of two Czech restaurants

I've long been a fan of Czech Stop in West, Texas about 20 miles north of Waco. Good cookies, cakes and yummy kolaches filled with tasty sausage, cheese and jalapenos. I've often thought that no one's kolaches even come close. I was wrong. Between Columbus and LaGrange on HWY 71 are two gas stations practically side by side. One is called Hruskas. Stop there on your next trip to Houston from Austin or vice versa. The pan sausage, jalapeno and cheese kolaches are scrumptious and make the ones from Czech Stop look like something out of a box from Randall's.

Posted by mcblogger at 09:18 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 18, 2007

Run, Rick... RUN!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketIt's not often I'll jump out for a candidate this far away from the Primary. It's also somewhat rare that the Mayor and I will disagree on anything. However, I'm doing something a little unusual because I'm ready to make some waves and I'm ready for candidate that will

BEAT THE SHIT OUT


OF CORNYN.

IMHO, that guy is Rick Noriega. Now, if we can only get him to run... Draft Rick Noriega is a great start and I invite you all to participate. Noriega is the only candidate with the combination of legislative and life experience that will allow him to challenge Cornyn on a level over and above anything he's ever faced.

You'll notice I said it's rare that the Mayor and I disagree. On this, I'm speaking only for myself. I think Spamburgler and Boobilicious are on board with Noriega as well, but I haven't been able to reach them since they've been on a month long bender at some ersatz resort near the Salton Sea. The Mayor's minimum requirement for a candidate is that they look 'vaguely humanoid'. So far, Emil Reichstadt and Mikal Watts have announced a run and both, clearly, fall within the parameters of what the Mayor considers a 'good candidate'. Why such low requirements? Whoever the nominee is, he/she will have to face Cornyn who looks like a cadaver. From an Ed Wood movie.

Whatever happens, Texas Democrats will have a much better looking candidate than the Republicans. Don't laugh, it's more important than you think.

So, the Mayor has opted to withhold his endorsement until he's able to meet all the candidates. It's the sensible thing to do so you know I want none of it.

For me, I'm with Noriega. Now all he has to do is file. Come on, Rick! Texas needs you! I like Mikal fine, but it's you I want to be our candidate. Don't make me settle for less!

Posted by mcblogger at 01:36 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Uhm... yeah. What Pink Dome said...

Sums it up quite nicely

Watts may have trouble getting the Democratic nomination with his anti-abortion rhetoric. "I personally have the view: I hold the pro-life position with three exceptions: one for rape, one for incest, one for the life of the mother," Watts said. Seriously? I know abortion is the wedgiest of wedge issues, but come on. We've already got old white men trying to take away women's rights...why do we need yet another one?

I hope you folks over at the TDP are paying attention and trying to find us someone that's not retarded to run for office, because quite frankly, some of the candidates running so far have been piss poor.

Posted by mcblogger at 08:22 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 17, 2007

Big shoes? Not necessarily impressive package

Yeah, yeah... I've heard it, too. The size of a guy's foot is close to the size of his dick. Turns out, not so much...

It's long been held as a popular belief that the larger a man's foot, the larger that gentleman's member, but Dr Karl explained that a UK study has dispelled the myth.

Two researchers from the Department of Urology at St Mary's Hospital in London, used a sample of 104 men and measured the penis length and related this to their shoe size. The average penis length was 13 cm, and the average shoe size was 9. After crunching the numbers, they found there was no significant correlation between the two.

13 cm, just FYI, is a little over 5 inches. Shit. Any well rounded gay man could have told you that shoe size has NOTHING to do with cock size.

Posted by mcblogger at 11:25 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 16, 2007

Noriega stomps Morales; Leppertsy wins

In Houston, Melissa Noriega solidly beat down Nutter Morales for Houston City Council! Awesome job, Team Noriega!

In Dallas, some guys who builds hospitals named Leppertsy won. The people of Dallas have once again opted for style over substance. Which is why their city sucks balls.

Good luck stopping the Trinity Toll Road now, peeps! I still love y'all (whatup, Dallas Progress!) but I know Leppertsy's kind. Y'all are going to get screwed without vasoline or a kiss.

Posted by mcblogger at 11:15 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 15, 2007

Decidership

Decidership

A form of government with one person exercising absolute power and unrestricted control in a government who regularly disregards opinions, petitions or mandates of the people or elected representatives.

Posted by mcblogger at 03:44 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

And this, boys and girls, is why ww have focus groups

I guess I picked the wrong election cycle to quit smoking dope.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 12:47 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

This guy for Surgeon General? Why not just nominate Dobson.

Connecticut native George W. Bush has nominated Dr. James W. Holsinger Jr. to be our next Surgeon General. Let's just say that he's one of those doctors who still thinks that homosexuality is a disease. He's also one of the people who has helped keep the United Methodist Church (of which I'm a member) not exactly friendly to it's LGBT members.

As a member of the church's Judicial Council, Dr. Holsinger voted with the majority to boot a lesbian from her post as a minister and to allow ministers to deny church membership to gay men and lesbians. It is not our place to tell religions what their beliefs should or should not be. But that stricture does not apply when bigotry masquerades as science. Dr. Holsinger prepared "Pathophysiology of Male Homosexuality" for the Committee to Study Homosexuality of the United Methodist Church, which was discussing whether to end the church's stance of not condoning homosexuality. Pathophysiology was defined as "abnormal function."

As a member of the UMC, I don't want this guy anywhere near my church anymore. Let's not even mention his 'Gay Conversion' project, Hope Springs

Another point of contention during Holsinger's nomination process was his affiliation with the Hope Springs Community Church, a United Methodist church. The Gay and Lesbian Medical Association and other LGBT health organizations expressed concern of Holsinger’s association with the church because of allegations that it condones reparative therapy. The church's pastor, David Calhoun was quoted as saying the church “ministers to people who no longer wish to be gay or lesbian.”

Yeah, not so much with this clown as Surgeon General. The HRC also thinks he's a the wrong person for the job. They have a petition up that you should really go sign.

Posted by mcblogger at 12:06 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

A heartwarming video...

about The Celebuslut's time in jail...

Posted by mcblogger at 08:56 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 14, 2007

TXU gets Oak Grove

And Austin gets some motherfuckin' dirty air...

The TCEQ has determined that the Oak Grove air permit will be protective of human health and the environment. This permit contains some of the cleanest emission standards ever set for a lignite power plant, and the plant will help meet Texas' near-term need for power."

Uhmmm... lignite. The absolute dirtiest coal you can use and one of the dirtiest fuels, other than peat, on the planet. Hello, EPA non-attainment!

Posted by mcblogger at 07:34 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Help Melissa Noriega on Saturday!

OK, Houston folks...time to get your asses in gear and elect a great leader to the Houston City Council! With just a few days left until the election on Saturday, it's time to pull out all the stops and take down the bizarre Morales.

Click here to go to the site and make sure you sign up to phonebank. The R's are pulling out all the stops to get their nutter, Roy Morales, elected. As Richard Morrison points out, this is massively important to Houston and the rest of Texas.

You guys in Houston are all the time talking about how good we have it in Austin with all these great Democrats in office. Trust us, you can have the same thing with a little work and keep another right wing crazy from the public office for which he's very much unqualified. Not to mention that damn near everyone in Houston political circles has endorsed Melissa.

Roy's also a douche. Kinda like that Leppertsy guy in Dallas. However, that's just my opinion. I'm not saying he's actually a plastic bottle of liquid that comes in a box labeled MASSENGILL. It's the act of using the bottle that most resembles Roy Morales.

Posted by mcblogger at 11:28 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Wilson, Phillips the one

No, not THAT one (didn't you SEE the comma?), THIS one...

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

But state Sen. Kirk Watson aired no objections. Watson, D-Austin, reviewed the choice at Perry's request because Wilson lives in Watson's Travis County district.

Watson said he worked closely with Wilson when Watson chaired the Greater Austin Chamber of Commerce.

The senator called Wilson "extremely competent. He works hard; he knows his business; he's a real straight shooter. As far as I am concerned, the governor can go forward."

Watson said Wilson assured him Wednesday that as secretary, he won't take a position on the Republican-favored idea of asking voters to present photo identification or other proof of identity before voting; Wilson believes that it would not be his role as secretary to take a position on identification proposals.

I trust Senator Watson, even if I don't particularly trust 39%. I do hope 39% doesn't try to screw Watson because paybacks are a bitch and Watson will still be in the Senate during the 2009 Session.

Sorry about the title, yo! It's a slow day for my brain.

Posted by mcblogger at 10:10 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Hey Babe... I was just watching you on C-SPAN

I got a crush on Obama

Posted by sister ruth at 07:35 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 13, 2007

Legislator gunned down

Unfortunately, it was not...

Warren Chisum
Charlie Howard
Leo Berman (Why God? Why not take him??!?!)
Tom CradDICK
Dan Patrick

Instead, it was some Mexican legislator who ran afoul of some drug dealers (I'm all the time telling them to be nice to the drug dealers!) and got himself shot. Of course, the Mexican government won't do much about it, and isn't that the really shocking part?

Seriously, y'all... you need to let a couple of the Federales go a little John Wayne/Clint Eastwood. Kill some folks

(h/t to PinkDome at Dome Of The Pink)

Posted by mcblogger at 09:20 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Speaking in Tongues 101

Giving new meaning to Madonna’s song, “Express Yourself”, excitable Christian boys and girls will soon be voguing in their respective public schools to the rapturous stylings of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Note to the new crusaders – The Jesus and Mary Chain is not a Christian rock band, though you are encouraged to attend one of their reunion tour concerts.

In other words, government-sponsored school prayer is back. Read the Religious Viewpoints Anti-Discrimination Act, which is also known as the Schoolchildren’s Religious Liberties Act, and you just know that our schools are about to be overrun by extremists. Not the students mind you, but every religious nut doing their best to trip up any teacher or administrator, especially a union member (because you know the religious right loves working people), who tries to inject some sanity into the school setting. No big surprise that the act is highly slanted towards Christianity with a Caucasian, paternal bias.

However, this act could be a blessing to females who want to witness for the Lord since the Bible commands them to keep their mouths shut in church, and we all know the infallibility of the Bible.

On second thought, creating “limited public forums” – i.e. proselytizing to unsuspecting youth – is the least religious activity a student should perform. The way conservatives have devastated public schools the past several decades, all students should have massive ceremonies to conjure up changes of biblical proportions. They could start by washing away the evilness of the likes of Charlie Howard and Kelly Shackelford. Just as people realized that school vouchers were anti-social justice because it took money from the poor to give to the rich, they will discover that this act is another hateful, divisive attempt to put “those” people in their place.

Just as disgusting as this law is the way the religious right was able to get this filth into our schools. What lead to this action is their accusations that public schools discriminate against Christians. This is an outright bold-face lie because students can already express religious viewpoints in homework and classroom discussions as long as the idea relates to the topic, and they can also initiate prayer.

The Christian mafia has made a cottage industry of making exaggerated claims on rare and badly-reported incidents of alleged discrimination so as to make an indictment that the entire country is against Christians. Such a plan would be humorous and idiotic if not for the fact that their goal is to create Christian madrassas.

Possibly the biggest harm is that these underdeveloped religious expressions will not convey the correct and discerning knowledge of Christian beliefs which could cause irreparable harm to impressionable youth who are in real need of guidance. The confusion could cause a student to act out in disastrous ways.

While a growing number of religions in many parts of this country are evolving by linking to each other to create ecumenism and interfaith pluralism so as to reach enlightened outcomes and peaceful existence, why does much of Texas continue to regress to fundamentalism isolation? When in God’s name is it going to stop?

Posted by Captain Kroc at 05:00 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Suggestive Email Subjects

Recieved from Barack Obama (yeah, like he really knows me) just moments ago:

What does a movement look like?

A little personal, isn't it, Senator?

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 03:23 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

When Bob falls down

You know, if I slipped and fell at Randall's (which I'm forced to visit AT LEAST three times a week due to my inability to formulate complete lists) I'd be lucky if I got $10 off my bill on my NEXT visit. That's because I live in Texas where tort reform (AKA Screw The Consumer) has taken hold thanks to the Republicans in the Lege in 2003 (Hey there, Arlene!). Good thing Robert Bork wasn't in Texas when he slipped and fell. If he had been, he probably wouldn't have been able to file his lawsuit against a venue for $1,000,000 in damages.

Judge Robert Bork, one of the fathers of the modern judicial conservative movement whose nomination to the Supreme Court was rejected by the Senate, is seeking $1,000,000 in compensatory damages, plus punitive damages, after he slipped and fell at the Yale Club of New York City. Judge Bork was scheduled to give a speech at the club, but he fell when mounting the dais, and injured his head and left leg. He alleges that the Yale Club is liable for the $1m plus punitive damages because they "wantonly, willfully, and recklessly" failed to provide staging which he could climb safely.

What makes this really funny, aside from the failed Supreme Court bid? Judge Bork has been one of the leading proponents of 'tort reform'. For this our resident attorney, Harry Balczak, has nominated him for the Attorney General Greg Abbott Golden Wheelie Award. Which I KNOW Harry will be writing about shortly.

Posted by mcblogger at 08:02 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 12, 2007

Hank endorses Edwards

At today's grassroots fundraiser for John Edwards here in Austin, the Edwards campaign announced the endorsement of widely popular 2006 Democratic Ag Commissioner candidate, Hank Gilbert. More to follow.

Posted by mcblogger at 05:48 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

McSleaze announces platform for TDP Chair's race

Part of McSleaze's plan to remake Texas acknowledges the fact that little can be done until Democrats control the Lege and the Governorship. However, once that's accomplished, he'll focus on setting an agenda which all Texans can get behind, including:

1) Making it a felony for a restaurant to charge for chips and salsa
2) Mandating that all persons who move to Texas take at least 24 classroom hours of "How to drive in Texas"
3) Liquor Parity Law which will require all establishments that serve beer to also serve liquor (the McBlogger Assistance Act)
4) Setting a minimum speed limit of 65 on all Texas highways and freeways
5) Reverse ALL non-smoking laws
6) Incinerate Larry The Cable Guy in an oven of his own design

McSleaze is committing to support all candidates in the 2008 cycle and beyond, with his personal funds if necessary, to create a new Democratic majority in Texas. He also vowed to import, on temporary work visas, up to 10,000 of his 'employees' to block walk in 2008 for Democrats.

"The time for caution has passed. Now is the time for bold action if we are to take the initiative and turn Texas blue! I ask for and frankly expect your support."

Mayor McSleaze then announced he'd received a key endorsement from Princess Stephanie


I've known Mayor McSleaze for years and he is, in my opinion, the best person to lead Texas Democrats to victory.

More endorsements will be forthcoming.

Posted by mcblogger at 11:04 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Dallas Mayor : In which Leppertsy outs himself...

... as just another Republican cocksucker.

The Dallas mayoral run-off between Ed Oakley and Tom Leppert is next Saturday, June 16. Early voting started June 4th.

Over the past week, and in Leppert's television ads, his campaign has been complaining about the Oakley campaign's "negative" ads, the recent endorsement of Oakley by the Dallas County Democrats (making the race appear to be overly-partisan according to some) and the stories about Oakley's sexual orientation seem to be getting a fair share of the attention in the press. Here and here. And now this. The robocalls. If you're not sure what that is, this overview from Alternet should help.

Yes, anti-fag robocalls will certainly do the trick! Way to go there, Leppertsy!

Posted by mcblogger at 09:16 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 11, 2007

YOU KNOW WHO finds God in jail

By Wednesday she'll be a Muslim.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 07:53 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Rejection blows...

Are you gay? Have you been rejected by eHarmony? Try this...

via Dungeon Diary

Posted by mcblogger at 02:27 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Girl, that M16 looks hella hot!

Via Dungeon Diary comes word that the Pentagon was developing a 'gay bomb' that would have rendered, when deployed, enemy troops instantly infatuated with each other. For those unable to read between the lines, it would have made them gay. Gay sex fiends. Gay sex fiends incapable of doing anything other than sucking off their buddy.

Yeah, since that's totally the way gay guys are. I know I'm all the time having sex with gay co-workers and friends. In fact I find it difficult to do anything other than have sex with my fellow gays.

$7.5 million for this? Couldn't we spend that money finding bin Laden?

Posted by mcblogger at 09:59 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 10, 2007

Lions and Bears and Aliens Voting, Oh My!

Via South Texas Chisme comes word that all hell has broken loose in San Antonio. Apparently voter fraud, the many-headed hydra that makes Baby Republican Jesus cry has broken out in the Alamo City.

County and federal officials acknowledged this week that they are looking into whether up to 41 non-citizens voted illegally in San Antonio, some repeatedly, in more than a dozen local, state and federal elections between 2001 and this year.

Great Caesar's Ghost, Batman! Up to forty-one (and let's be honest about this, the qualifier "up to" usually means "actual number is less than"} unqualified voters were involved in elections over the past SIX years?

(Bexar County Elections Administrator Jacque} Callanen said it was not readily apparent that the illegal voting influenced an election's outcome.

No shit, Sherlock!

In the 2004 election, more than 475,000 votes were cast in Bexar County. "Up to" forty-one votes would represent "up to" eight THOUSANDTHS of a percent of that total. In the 2006, more than a quarter-million votes were cast for governor, including 87 for some write-in candidate named James "Patriot" Dillon. Even May's Constitutional Amendment canvass attracted more than 84,000 Bexarites... our illegal voters would have tipped the scales at less than five-hundredths of one percent, not that it would have mattered much in a race that was won with 87%.

Voter ID: clearly a solution in search of a problem.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 01:50 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Yeah... we all feel the same way...

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

To all our British friends... this is how we all feel. We'd like to proffer an apology for the boorish behavior of our President. Hey, we just barely tolerate him.

(props to PinkDome for the great pic)

Posted by mcblogger at 12:37 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

June 09, 2007

down at The Pride

Sitting at the Stonewall Dems booth at The Gay Pride right now. Mark McCulloch just told that Ann Richards is, in fact, alive and performing with the Austin Babtist Women.

Damn y'all... Is it just me or is it hot as balls?

Posted by mcblogger at 02:50 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

It's about time, HBO

In case you are living in a hole somewhere, 'The Sopranos' started airing the second half of its final season a few weeks ago and will wrap up on Sunday. All I have to say is it is about fucking time! Between the hiatus' before and during season six, it is somewhat surprising that anyone gives a shit anymore. Don't get me wrong, it's a good show that will be sorely missed once season six comes to an end. It has had such interesting story arcs and wonderful characters. My favorite has always been Silvio Dante. Who can forget how he handled Tony's Russian girlfriend, Irina, in season 2. "You got a short window. It's not good to get too hung up on any one thing." I loved it! If I could kill a character it would be a toss up between A.J. and Janice. They both suck. Anyway, just in case you feel the need for a stroll down memory lane (just in time for the finale on Sunday), here's the entire series. In seven minutes.

Posted by barfly at 11:32 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Stop Cornyn goes live...

An enterprising group has put up StopCornyn, a blog dedicated to ridding Texans of their albatross of a Senator, John 'Zombie' Cornyn. I've been calling him Corpsyn for a while but The Mayor is all the time telling me to stop it. So I've decided to just call him what he most appears to be, a zombie. Do I really think that the junior Senator from Texas is a flesh-eating member of the living dead?

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket






Absolutely








PDiddie over at Brains and Eggs (which is, coincidentally, one of the grossest breakfasts in the world) has a Zombie greatest hits list up of all the retarded things the assclown has said over the years.

StopCornyn is not attached to any campaign and it's not part of the Democratic Party. Just a few well meaning Texans who aim to make sure that in January, 2009 there is a real Texan in the Senate not some whiny bitch.

Posted by mcblogger at 01:05 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 08, 2007

I hate stupid movie commercials

There've been fifty-six deaths in 1408.

Hard to imagine how that damn hotel stays in business.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 10:26 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Lieberman visits Iraq

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

And says everything is wonderful!

Posted by mcblogger at 06:17 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Pena's the one

There was a rumor that Aaron Pena was going to retire from the House which of course provoked tears of sadness from the other members of the Iscariot Caucus as well as Speaker CradDICK himself. The good news is, we'll have Aaron Pena to kick around as it's clear he's running for re-election.

The idea of a primary opponent for him is still be kicked around by a number of his constituents who are still pissed about his actions this session. Personally, I think it's a load of crap and that they won't be able to gather the support they'll need to unseat him. Still, it would be good to see someone take him out.

Yes, Representative, we're still pissed about that one vote. It turned out to matter much more than even we thought it would.

Posted by mcblogger at 12:18 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Leahy and Specter want to restore Habeas Corpus

It's about time...

Many of you may recall the hasty passage of the Military Commissions Act in the weeks leading up to last year's election, a bill that set new rules for trying detainees, in particular those currently being held at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba.

The passage of this bill was a profound mistake, and its elimination of habeas corpus review was its worst error. Righting this wrong is one of my top priorities, and on the first day of this Congress I joined with Senator Arlen Specter to introduce the Habeas Corpus Restoration Act (S. 185). This bipartisan bill already has 17 cosponsors, but it faces a crucial vote in the Judiciary Committee this Thursday so we need your help.

Please e-mail your home-state Senators today and urge them to protect our fundamental liberties by supporting the Habeas Corpus Restoration Act!

The Congress has a ton of work to do to restore the civil liberties we've lost under Connecticut native George W. Bush. It's good to see them taking the first steps!

Posted by mcblogger at 08:59 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

June 07, 2007

So, you want to be in pictures?

No problem... just take out your dick, place it on a table and hit it with a hammer. Or listen to Johnny Knoxville, who will pay you more than $10 MILLION to put your dick in a mousetrap.

JACKASS star Johnny Knoxville is being sued over claims he talked an actor into putting his penis in a mousetrap. Perry Caravello wants £5million damages after the incident on a live radio show.

Caravel lo claims he was injured when the trap went off and needed medical treatment. And he says he was humiliated when a video of the prank appeared on the internet. Knoxville, 36, is renowned for sick stunts on his MTV show.

In court documents filed in Los Angeles, Caravello's lawyer said: "He was promised by Johnny Knoxville that he would be paid £5million if he placed his penis in a mousetrap. "He agreed to do so and, much to his emotional tranquility and physical harm, was severely injured when the trap went off. "The incident has been circulated on the internet to his prejudice and humiliation."

He is also suing DJ Adam Corolla and comedian Jimmy Kimmel, who were in the studio but did not stop the stunt.

Uhm... yeah. The I don't see Knoxville writing that check any time soon. Especially not when there are kids doing it for free.

No, I'm not posting the video of that dumbass. Sister Ruth and probably Mike Krusee would like it too much.

Posted by mcblogger at 05:38 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

What to do with the old microwave...


MICROWAVE TECHNOLOGY HOMEMADE - video powered by Metacafe

I don't know if these guys are smarter than hell or crazier than my great aunt who thought the oil well removing oil from the ground under her would cause the ground to collapse and swallow her up. However, you gotta admit this would be fun as hell to have.

Posted by mcblogger at 06:10 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 06, 2007

Fear and loathing (mostly loathing) in Grapevine

I'm in lovely Grapevine tonight. Seriously, it's lovely. No, really. I love the DFW mid-cities. They rock. Damn y'all, I'm really becoming an Austin snob, aren't I? Well, fuck it. It's not my fault y'all don't live in Austin.

I'm at some stupid hotel called the Gaylord Texan (laugh it up Kroc and McSleaze). What's funnier than the name?


THE FACT THAT THEY WON'T LET ME SMOKE


No, I'm not kidding. The bitches have a nice little placard on the night stand that has some random bullshit about the hotel being a non-smoking environment and that guests will be charged $250 for smoking in the room. Do the windows open? Nope. Sealed fucking shut, kinda like Libby's sphincter right about now. I have to get on the elevator and go the hell outside. I'm not pleased. And it's creeping me the fuck out because it seriously reminds me of the Overlook Hotel in the original Shining.

If you read the comments in my post about the trip to Houston earlier this week, you know I don't have a picture ID at the moment (thus, my trip up the 35). This is mentioned to preface my oh-so-hilarious check in story in which Mr. Takes-His-Clerk-Job-Way-Too-Seriously at the front desk PUT ME THROUGH THE WRINGER about not having a picture ID. From my POV... I'm paying and have a credit card the name on which is matched by my paper temporary. Charge it up and let me into my room, cunthair. From his POV, 'I need to ask a manager about this'. Sure, pal, go ask your manager who right about now is finishing off his eighth Jack and Coke while watching Japanese scat. Your dumbass is worried about my ID being a paper temporary? His job would be a lot easier if he didn't try to think.

And with that, I go now to pollute the air in Grapevine with all my horrible cigarette smoke.

Posted by mcblogger at 10:45 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Do you want freedom fries with that?

The other day, I went to the bookstore to purchase George Lakoff’s book, “Whose Freedom.” The book is about republican’s warped framing of the word freedom, and how it actually curtails and devalues the idea.

On the cover is the word freedom five times. The top four are scratched out; the bottom one had bold red underlines with a big red question mark. It gets your attention.

I brought the book up to the register and the lady rings it up and says, “Would you like your freedom in a bag.” She caught herself and then said, “I mean book in a bag.” I’m not real quick on the trigger, so my lame, corny response was, “I hope it never gets to that point.”

As I was driving home, the thought came to me that I hadn’t even turned the cover and Lakoff had already made his point. Maybe, I’ll return the book since the clerk had already given me the abbreviated version.

Posted by Captain Kroc at 12:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Anouncing the McBlogger Marriage Institute

It's been a while since Chisum passed his little marriage bill and frankly we're excited as hell because The Mayor and I are opening up the McBlogger Marriage Institute.

Yeah, neither of us have been married (it's illegal for me and The Mayor likes to 'own' not 'rent'). However, we'll have staff who will teach the classes (that will free you from the onerous $60 marriage license fee) who have been married/divorced/restraining ordered or some combo thereof and know all about the State requirements. Plus! We'll charge only $40 for the class, quite the bargain versus that far-too-high $60 fee the state requires. Not only will you get a FABULOUS education, you'll also save $20 on the cost of gettin' hitched.

Hell, we'll even throw in a free beer*! Email us now at mcblogger@mcblogger.com and put in the subject line MARRIAGE SCAM.

For all the divorce attorneys out there... contact either The Mayor or myself and we'll get you an all access pass for a small fee. Might as well get your name out there early!

*Domestic draft only. Oh, hell... we might as well tell you. It's Natty Light.


Posted by mcblogger at 11:38 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Are you, like me, wondering about buying a nuke?

It's true, it's true... I'm in the market for a small nuclear weapon. I won't say why, let's just say there is a small town somewhere in Texas that, in my opinion, deserves to have a really bad day.

Kidding! I'm actually looking to build a reservoir of my own where I can build a lake house and spend my retirement. I'll sell a few of the remaining lots to some gullible foreigners. Maybe folks from Minnesota?

ANYWAY, I'm in need of a small atomic device and I've been wondering where to get it and how hard it might be. It's not like you can just run down to HEB or Neiman's and pick one up. So, this book will be VERY helpful to me. If I had a copy AND a few million dollars.

So much for non-proliferation.

Posted by mcblogger at 09:40 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 05, 2007

The Children! Will No One Think Of The Children?

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketAmong the interesting ephemera to emerge from the I Lewis Libby trial (Yes, Kay Bailey, perjury turns out to be a crime after all) is a collection of letters from the neoncon movers and shakers begging the judge to go easy on ol' Scoot Scoot.

One of the most touching is an appeal from the Beltway's Odd Couple, Reagan's literary fellatrix Mary Matalin and Democratic "strategist" James Carville.

I have seen what this trial has done to my own kids, just their reading about it. I cannot imagine the toll on Scooter and Harriet's young ones. Setting aside the pain of the Libby family, my girls just don't understand. They're old enough to intellectually comprehend the facts of the case but associating these "facts" wit "Mr. Scooter" remains a complete disconnect to them.

Mary! Your kids are what? Eight? What are they doing reading the Washington Post? Get 'em an X-Box before they grow up to be like you!

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 09:43 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBack

Periodic table of criminal elements...

Loving it...

table.jpg

Posted by mcblogger at 07:51 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

It's easy to agitate for war...

... when you don't have to fight which is, apparently, what makes Bill Kristol such an aggressive chickenhawk. Keep in mind that he's been wrong about EVERYTHING from the initial invasion of Iraq to the current 'surge' strategy which is, apparently, going nowhere. Now he and Frederick Kagan are agitating for an attack on Iran.

Calling the State Department’s recent talks with Iran and Syria “fantasy diplomatic solutions,” Kristol and Kagan instead advocate that “[d]iplomatic engagement by itself is a trap,” suggesting, as they both have before, that America should only deal militarily with Iraq’s neighbors. Such a policy would likely accelerate nuclear development in Iran and has been swiftly rejected by top U.S. military commanders.

Kristol and Kagan aim for a single objective: more war. As Glenn Greenwald noted, “What they [Kristol and Kagan] seek — by their own acknowledgment — is a conflict with Iran and Syria, and they want to stay in Iraq because that is how that goal can be achieved.”

Bill, the ship has sailed. You and your fellow neocons shot your wad with Iraq, fucked it all up and now want a do-over? Not so much, dipshit.

At some point you have to wonder when folks will put this idiot out to pasture?

Posted by mcblogger at 03:09 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Rove's been busy with the US Attorney's office

Oops... The worlds most powerful ButterTroll may get his tit caught in a wringer over something else entirely...

The allegation was made by Dana Jill Simpson, a lifelong Republican and lawyer who practices in Alabama. She made the charges in a May 21 affidavit, obtained by TIME, in which she describes a conference call on November 18, 2002, which involved a group of senior aides to Bob Riley, who had just narrowly defeated Siegelman in a bitterly contested election for governor. Though Republican Riley, a former Congressman, initially found himself behind by several thousand votes, he had pulled ahead at the last minute when disputed ballots were tallied in his favor. After the abrupt vote turnaround, Siegelman sought a recount. The Simpson affidavit says the conference call focused on how the Riley campaign could get Siegelman to withdraw his challenge.

According to Simpson's statement, William Canary, a senior G.O.P. political operative and Riley adviser who was on the conference call, said "not to worry about Don Siegelman" because "'his girls' would take care of" the governor. Canary then made clear that "his girls" was a reference to his wife, Leura Canary, the U.S. attorney for the Middle District of Alabama, and Alice Martin, the U.S. attorney for the Northern District of Alabama.

Canary reassured others on the conference call — who also included Riley's son, Rob, and Terry Butts, another Riley lawyer and former justice of the Alabama supreme court — that he had the help of a powerful pal in Washington. Canary said "not to worry — that he had already gotten it worked out with Karl and Karl had spoken with the Department of Justice and the Department of Justice was already pursuing Don Siegelman," the Simpson affidavit says. Both U.S. attorney offices subsequently indicted Siegelman on a variety of charges, although Leura Canary recused herself from dealing with the case in May 2002. A federal judge dismissed the Northern District case before it could be tried, but Siegelman was convicted in the Middle District on bribery and conspiracy charges last June.

Yes, Siegelman was convicted... here's the synopsis on that...

Siegelman was convicted of appointing Scrushy to a hospital regulatory board in exchange for a $500,000 contribution to a campaign for a state lottery to fund education. Defense lawyers have argued that Siegelman drew no personal financial benefit from Scrushy's donation to the lottery campaign, and they note that Scrushy had served on the hospital regulatory board under three previous governors, before Siegelman reappointed him. The reappointment, they have argued, offered little of value to Scrushy except more work.

So, there was NO payoff to the Governor and there was no real benefit to Scrushy, other than maybe getting a sweet deal for his company, HealthSouth which, coincidentally, is having major issues with Scrushy and his backdating of stock options. Needless to say, Scrushy's not a good guy. However, there was nothing that personally benefited Siegelman, which is exactly what you'd need in a case like this. Seigelman may not pass the smell test, but he's hardly a Duke Cunntingham.

$10 says he walks on appeal. Any takers?

Posted by mcblogger at 07:01 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

I'm traveling...

I'm in Houston tonight, then on to Dallas. I'm not happy. I had dinner at some awful place called Massa's in Houston (REPULSIVE) and am staying at what has to be the shittiest Hyatt Hotel in the entire chain (yes, Sister Ruth... it's the same one from the TDP convention in 2004). This shitbox hotel only has wireless through T-Mobile. They also have wired but when I called down to inquire as to the location of the Cat 5 plug, the asshat who answered asked 'What's Cat 5?'

I now have an account with T-Mobile. Yay.

To top it all off, my smoking room doesn't have a fucking ashtray. So, I'm improvising with a soapdish. At $300 per night, natch.

To my peeps in Houston Metro (Hey Y'all!) I can only say don't get mad at me for not calling. Honestly. You sooo wouldn't want to be around unhappy McBlogger right now. Remember the good times... I know I certainly will. I don't want to find myself hating on Houston where I've had some DAMN good times (Hey Muse!)

The Mayor will be entertaining you during my inevitable absences. In the meantime, for the Houstonians, please tell me what the fuck is the problem with the 10? It took me AN HOUR to get from Hwy 6 into downtown. Are people in Katy just stupid or what?

Posted by mcblogger at 12:18 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack

June 04, 2007

What if the smoking gun came in the form of dead air?

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice to right-wing gasbag Sean Hannity:

Freedom of speech, freedom of association and freedom of conscience are not a thorn in the side of government. Disagreeing with your government is not unpatriotic and most certainly should not be a crime in any country, especially a democracy.

Okay, small misstatement of fact on my part. Condi wasn't speaking on Fox News but instead at a meeting of OAS foreign ministers and she was actually speaking about events in Venezuela, where bonapartist dictator Hugo Chavez recently shut down a hostile TV network and threatened to do the same to others.

Irony accomplished.

For his part, Chavez's representative compared Bush to ho hum Hitler, and not favorably either. Still, considering that Chavez had previously referred to Bobo as the Devil, some say this could actually be a sign that Chavez wants better relations with the country whose purchases of his oil finance his revolution.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 03:47 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Go Melissa, Go!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at PhotobucketIt's Melissa Monday once again, this time early voting has begun in Houston... time to get thine ass to a poll and vote! Early voting is also going on in Dallas and you all know how we feel about that(the guy who builds bars).

Posted by mcblogger at 01:16 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Lincoln-Douglas it ain't

Did anyone happen to catch the debate last night? My favorite part was when Mike Gravel bit the head off the bat. Finally the Democrats have a fourth-tier candidate who isn't afraid to stand up to the powerful winged mammal lobby.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 10:02 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

How did comsumers fare in the 80th Lege?

Pretty damn badly according to Coby over at Bay Area Houston who has done an amazing job of keeping track of just what Republicans have enabled insurers to do to Texas homeowners.

Insurance. No bills were passed to address the failure of insurance deregulation. Rates should continue to rise especially during the hurricane season. Currently Texas has the highest rates in the nation.

Get ready for your renewal and the (more than likely) premium increase.

Posted by mcblogger at 08:58 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 03, 2007

Breaking news from the Bilderberg Conference

Reliable sources have confirmed that the Bilderberg Conference is just the start of a whirlwind tour for Texas Governor Rick Perry. On Monday, he is slated for an appearance in Bangkok where he will named as an associate member for the Trilateral Commission. The board will present him an infant purchased from the black market in the Klong Toey slum. A Perry spokesperson has denied rumors that sacrifice is on the table.

Later in the week, Perry will travel to an undisclosed island off the coast of Greece to receive a lifetime achievement award from the Illuminati.

But it doesn’t end there. After the ceremony he will be spirited to a deep underground cavern beneath Epcot Center in Orlando to advise Walt Disney’s brain and Dick Nixon’s head as they try to overcome personal challenges that prevented them from world domination through the use of the BOB FM radio format. As of Friday, the stock was slightly up from a 52 week low in light trading.

A leak from a mole deep in the organization states that the reason for failure might have been the overuse of half durations of bass used during the bridge section of the song “Afternoon Delight” by the Starlight Vocal Band. The source goes on to claim that at this time other radio networks have not been affected, and that it is still ok to keep listening to the song on your old K-Tel albums.

It should be noted that the source of the leak is an actual mole, and a distant cousin of Mickey Mouse. However, when you think of moles in the Disney Empire, think of the oompa-loompas in The Chocolate Factory – there are thousands of them and detection from authorities is almost non-existence.

In related news, Rupert Murdoch has started an exploratory committee to gauge interest in running for world dictator.

Posted by Captain Kroc at 03:20 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Jokes of My Father's : Sometimes a picture says it all

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

The email my father forwarded has some lame pseudo Mastercard commercial attached to it. I leave that part off because honestly, it's really unnecessary. The picture is, itself, pret-a-porter comedy.

Posted by mcblogger at 11:40 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 02, 2007

America's Got (NO) Talent

NBC has decided to rip off American Idol by creating their own show that will feature nothing but talentless cretins so starved for attention that they are willing to humiliate themselves on live TV. The only redeeming factor that I can find to make what I'm sure will be an absolute nightmare of a show not quite as awful as AI is that this one allows ANY kind of talent. Juggling? Sure. Playing the squeezebox? You bet. Miming? Uh huh.

Wait, did I write 'not quite as awful as'? Upon reflection, allow me to revise to 'as bad as if not infinitely worse than'. I'm talking end of the world kinda bad. The kind of bad that allows demons from some hitherto unknown dimension to come forth and wreck havoc on the world. Locusts swarming everything. Nuclear bombs going off over cities. Basically the worst parts of the Bible, as Billy Bob Thornton advised the President in Armageddon. It will no doubt make Bill Paxton scream 'Game over, man! Game over!' which, while it may provide a laugh, won't stop the inevitable destruction of all that we know and cherish.

You'll probably die, too.

Are we so starved for 'media personalities' that we have to keep raiding the British isles for them? Wasn't Simon Cowell enough? Why do we need Sharron Osborne (who's only claim to fame is marrying Ozzy) and some other English douche who may or may not have been the asshole that spit at me the last time I was in NYC?

The third judge? DAVID 'I'm HUGE in Germany' HASSELHOFF?!??! He's qualified to evaluate someone's level of talent? Because he drove a talking car and played second fiddle to Pamela Anderson's baby voice and boobs (mostly her boobs)?

NBC... ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS SHIT? I'd be fine if you just reran episodes of 30 Rock and The Office. Over and over again. PLEASE DON'T DO THIS TO AMERICA!

Posted by mcblogger at 11:56 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

June 01, 2007

Night Flight to Mordor

Grab your tinfoil stetsons! Rick Perry, his taste for human flesh piqued by last week's bloodbath at the Capitol, is on his way to the super-secret Bilderberg Conference.

The invitation-only conference was started in 1954 and named for the Dutch hotel where the conference was first held. Those who attend promise not to reveal what was discussed, security is tight, and the press and public are barred.

The conference has been the subject of conspiracy theorists and even Christian groups who wonder about its influence.

Robert Black, the governor's press secretary, said the governor was invited to attend and speak about state-federal relations. Mr. Black dismissed the conspiracy theories.

Of course. He would, wouldn't he?

Bwa ha hah haa!

Of course, like most super-secret meetings, we naturally know quite a bit about it, including many of the attendees. Goodhair will be talking about federalism, while most of the discussion will focus on world domination and the story arc for the next three seasons of The View. The conference will end Sunday with the traditional blueberry muffin bakeoff.

Oh, and one more thing. As the new guy, Rick has to bring the beer. That's why in the new budget the Lege gives him a raise of $32,000 while figuring that teachers should be happy with $430.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 07:42 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

How could you NOT trust a guy nicknamed "Big Weasel"?

California, you've broken my heart!

The founder of an anti-gang group called No Guns was arrested for allegedly selling firearms to federal undercover agents.

Hector ``Big Weasel'' Marroquin, 51, was arrested Thursday at his Downey home on charges of selling an assault rifle, a machine gun, two pistols and two silencers, said Susan Raichel, a spokeswoman for the federal Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 04:44 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Spellcheck on Aisle Five

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

As someone mentioned, there might be an opening right about now.

Posted by mayor mcsleaze at 03:42 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Sly Turner's ego is once again threatening Texans

Oh, I really hate this guy.

There is also a looming concern that the demand for electricity is growing at a faster rate than the growth in generation capacity. That possibility threatens not only residential consumers but also the vitality of Texas' economy. The nation watched in 2000 and 2001 as California suffered from blackouts and it is imperative that Texas does everything in its power to prevent such an occurrence here.

The 80th Regular Session ended without any legislation to assist residential consumers. The bipartisan compromise bill, Senate Bill 482, passed the Senate and would have overwhelmingly passed in the House if not for a technical error. I believe that the Legislature has the will to codify consumer protections.

Sly, you're an idiot. Today, tomorrow, next week and years from now you'll still be an idiot. The CA power crises was caused by only one thing... manipulation of a supposedly open market in the West. I guess Sly didn't know that during some of the worst times that summer almost 25% of the generating capacity in CA was deliberately taken off line.

In Texas, we don't need coal plants. We need solar and wind. We need transmission lines from wind farms in the west. We need capacitors and batteries to hold the electricity generated. None of this is impossible but it's going to take forcing the utilities to realize that they are going to have to change things if they want to avoid heavy-duty regulation.

We don't need a special session to do that. We need the PUC to get off it's ass. We certainly don't need to open the door to a special session in which Voter Suppression could come back up. Dewhearse, who is still shitting out of his mouth about Voter Suppression, would love that too much.

Don't be a dick, Sly. Put your ego aside for once, you self-aggrandizing douche.

Posted by mcblogger at 03:35 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Bush shows off fake border security station

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

President Bush recently visited one of our newest border security stations. In Glynco, GA. Which is here...

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Yeah, I bet the people in Georgia are happy now that they can control immigration... from Atlantis.

(via Wonkette)

Posted by mcblogger at 02:22 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Dallas Mayor : WHAT A DOUCHE

You know, I mostly think Dallas is a hellish shithole of a city anyway (topped only by Houston metro - have I pissed off enough folks, yet?) so you deserve a Mayor like Tom Leppertsy. Dallas Progress (which is inexplicably supporting Leppert) has a recap of their lame debate. My FAVORITE clip...

Leppertsy : My company is $8 BILLION. I build hospitals and I love the sick and infirm. That other guy just builds bars. My company is like a quadzillion times bigger than the City of Dallas. I'm rad. The other guy just builds bars. My hair is inflammable. The other just builds bars.


VOTE FOR THE GUY WHO BUILDS BARS, DALLAS! Don't waste your time with some criscocrotch. Sure, Oakley's a nut about the 'let's tear down the slums' thing. However, he builds bars and we love us some bars. Plus, we think Leppertsy is a douche.

Posted by mcblogger at 10:26 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Republican tax cuts...

...really do benefit the wealthy.

From an article in Conde Nast Portfolio, Texas billionaire T. Boone Pickens made $1.504 billion in 2005. He paid $279 million in taxes, making his effective tax rate 18.55% or less than half the 39% rate that was in place prior to Connecticut native George W. Bush's presidency.

Is there anyone left who doesn't think the tax cuts at the beginning of the decade disproportionately benefited the wealthy? Is it any wonder that Boone Pickens spends so much money on contributions to Republican candidates (not to mention his role in financing Swift Boat Veterans for Truth).

Posted by mcblogger at 09:13 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Best story of the day

Walter Matthau and his wife had taken a trip to Auschwitz. As they were about to enter one of the gas chambers with their tour guide, a woman runs up to him.

"Oh my God, Mr. Matthau!" she screamed. "I am such a huge fan of yours! Would you mind giving me an autograph?"

"What?" he responded. "Absolutely not. That's completely inappropriate. I can't believe you would even ask me that here." With that, him, his wife and the guide go into the chamber.

About an hour later, he's walking out of the compound, and the woman approaches him again.

"I just want you to know," she says "You ruined my trip to Auschwitz!"

via Michelle Collins' You Can't Make It Up.

Posted by mcblogger at 12:57 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack